ONE MAN, ONE WIFE

Dearly Beloved, ONE MAN, ONE WIFE “And [Jesus Christ] answered and said to them, ‘Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”?’” (Matthew 19:4-5 NKJV). The mind of anyone who attended secondary schools or who was a student of literature in English in any tertiary institution in Nigeria in the 1970s and 1980s may likely go to one of the books of Timothy Mofolorunso “T.M.” Aluko (1918-2010) titled “ONE MAN, ONE WIFE”. However, this message is not about that book though invariably it is about the controversy in the book: monogamy versus polygamy. Many African cultures and some world religions especially Islam encourage polygamy (having more than one wife at a given time) while the conventional Christianity sticks to monogamy (having only one wife at a given time) as the ideal and original form of marriage. Recently, some clergymen started advocating polygamy in Christianity claiming that God did not (and still does not) condemn polygamy in the Bible. They are ready to refer to many Bible characters like Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others that were polygamists, and yet had very intimate relationships with God. There is even a Bible reference, 2 Samuel 12:8, where God sent prophet Nathan to rebuke King David for David’s adulterous and murderous sin, and God was saying that He was ready to give David more wives if he had wanted! Did God ever approve polygamy or any other form of marriage apart from monogamy that is one man, one wife? This is a question that one needs to answer sincerely without any sentiment. It is a fact that polygamy has been practiced almost as early as man has been on earth. The first recorded polygamist in the Bible was the murderer Lamech (Genesis 4:23-24). Would one say that because polygamy has been an age-long practice, it should become the norm? Interestingly, sin generally is older than polygamy! Would that made sin acceptable or right? Does the fact that God tolerated some polygamous people in the Bible make polygamy right? While Jesus Christ was answering question about divorce, He referred to the original plan and purpose of God for marriage: one man, one wife (see Matthew 19:4-5; Mark 10:5-9). In His infinite wisdom, when God was solving the problem of aloneness for the first man, Adam, He created ONE WOMAN for him (see Genesis 2:18-25), and for that reason He said that the man will cleave to his wife (note: not wives!). However, in some men’s finite wisdom, they started having many wives, and they think that that is the best for them. There is no way a finite arrangement can supersede an infinite one. God may permit some people to have more than one wife like He, through Moses, “because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted [the Israelites] to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so” (Matthew 19:8 NKJV). It has been proved from experiences that the ideal form of marriage is monogamy. People that come from polygamous background will testify to this. Any other form of marriage apart from monogamy (whether polygamy, bigamy, polyandry, polygyny, group marriage, same-sex marriage, fixed-term marriage, or symbolic marriage) is an aberration. There are some people who have only one spouse, but they engage in extra-marital affairs with other people. That is called adultery, and it a sin. Anyone who commits it sins against his/her body (see 1 Corinthians 6:18), spouse, and ultimately God. The implication of this is that a man should be faithful to his legally wedded wife (not wives), and a woman should be faithful to her legally wedded husband (not husbands). (It has to be noted here that the word “wife” originally referred to a woman, not to a man as some same-sex marriage advocates would want us to accept today.) Any sexual and marital affair outside one man, one wife is a sin no matter how popular or acceptable it may be in any culture or religion. Period! In His service, Bayo Afolaranmi (Pastor). Prayer Point: Pray that you will not pervert the original plan and purpose of marriage in any way, and that you will be faithful to your legally wedded spouse all the time. NB Please send your reaction to this message directly to (or copy me at) spiritualdigest@yahoo.com. Thanks.